Even thoughts are heavy...

A wise man once said "I was not born with enough middle fingers". Not that it would do any good. It's like shouting at a wall, you can yell at the world all you want but don't expect a response.

Venting here does a little good at easing my frustrations, but, the problems persist. After talking with the doctor and finding out Dad will eventually succumb to the cmml is hard to take. I try to help as much as I can and always be there for them but I also find it frustrating that Dad does not consider anyone but himself. I am here to help any way I can but I have a family and responsibilities I need to tend to myself.

On a good note I have certain opportunities opening up to me but at the same time it could not have happened at a worse moment in my life. Why can't things just fall into place when they are supposed to. With all of the stress I am under I find it difficult to concentrate at work. Let alone be creative at home. And being creative is one of the things that bring me great joy.

I know it's better to adapt to change but can't things just ease off just a little. How can anyone get comfortable in a life...ever?